this is a small section of the road i drive to work.

the drive takes 45 minutes each way and a good portion of the road is like this.  on the way i'll climb one mountain pass and go by 5 lakes.  for part of the drive there is no cell phone service and limited radio reception.  in the summer someone drove off the road every few weeks.  now when i make the drive home it's dark and in the morning it's sometimes icy.  

i'll admit i was daunted by the thought of driving this road 5 days a week when i first started my new job.  

no amount of positive thinking is going to make this drive any shorter or less worrisome.  

but i've also come to see how i manage my mind during this drive does make a difference.  1.5 hours a day is a lot of time to drive and think.  i can use the thinking time to polish up and add strength and solidity to worries and hurts or i can turn my mind away from this stuff and toward pleasant memories, things that are going well, or positive wishes for others.

it was at about this corner a few weeks ago that i remembered a visit with a friend who was soon to be told she was terminally ill.  of course neither she nor i knew this at the time.  i was on my way through her town and as always she offered me a comfortable bed in her guest room and a warm breakfast before i headed out the next morning.  when i arrived she was watching a travel show on New Zealand and we watched it together talking afterward about her own trip to New Zealand.  it was a simple time but filled with warmth and now this evening, the last i was able to spend with her, is a fond memory.

this week i traveled 3 hours south for work training.  for a day i got to sit in a room with 45 other women who do the same kind of work i do.  a large circle of women working to help other women and it was uplifting to be in their midst.  the workshop facilitator was Vikki Reynolds and she spoke about bringing Revolutionary Love or Therapeutic Love to our work with clients.  even though i've long believed this work is about love, not romantic love but a different kind of love, i don't think i've ever heard anyone acknowledge this.  

another sweet moment this week included more birds - mergansers this time - i was at the shore for a few minutes in the early morning and the sun was shining.  i saw 16 mergansers running back and forth on the water.  they would run on top of the water for about 15 feet and then turn sharply around and run back again.  i've read that running on the water is courtship behavior for shore birds but i assumed this was the wrong time of year for courtship.  i asked my mother about it this morning and she says male and female mergansers often inhabit separate areas in the summers and return to courting each other in the fall.  

now knitting talk:  when i restarted the Sound of Waves wrap for my mother i went up a needle size and i think it's turning out better.  

 

i also started a Miura Cowl for myself with some bits of favorite leftover yarns.  the light tan is a merino dyed with cutch, the darker tan is some Blue Sky Alpaca and the very pale pink is some milk fiber dyed with a weak cochineal bath.  the gentle folds in this pattern make it fun to knit.

 

 

Comments

[donna lee]

I think the most effective therapists are the ones who are able to allow some love to show through. So many people we see are sorely in need of some love. And why is it wrong to make them feel like they're worthy of someone else's caring? It sounds like a good workshop.

I just spent a day with a room full of people learning to take care of ourselves and to protect ourselves from the trauma we listen to every day. Also a good day.

[RoseRed]

Your mum's wrap is looking great.

I don't think I would much like to drive that road either, but it's good that drive gives you valuable quiet thinking time. I tend to only get that in the shower, and it's never long enough!

I think what you do is definitely a form of love. Love for other people, in that it is a caring profession, and I suppose (without knowing exactly what you do) helping people find the love within themselves, whether it is love for themselves or love for others.

[carolyn]

we've lost touch. i miss u. Email me! I've just started knitting again ...

[Kateryn]

ah! so you found out about the birds! :)

[Luisa]

:-*

. Happy to see that milk fiber is still at work!

. And regarding the type of work you do, I call it enduring love. There's even a set of photos in you-know-where from the time I took that trip downtown every week...

[Nicole]

Michele, I love to read about your good thoughts. Though I too would find a long drive daunting, I admire how you've turned it in to something with much more meaning.

[kat]

when i used to commute 45 min. each way to work I would say mantras. i got a lot of "work" done during those times. it helped with the stress of commuting. i love your blog.